In the line of fire - literally too

It's just last week i finished reading Pervez Musharraf's autobiography - In the line of fire.Apt especially given the current situation.The now ex army chief speaks sorry blows his trumpet throughout the book;right from page 1 till the last page.He of all the person speaks about how Bhutto & Sharif and their likes plundered the nation of it's wealth & political freedom.Bah..For someone who says he is simple there's nothing simple in the way he thinks when it comes to India.Sly rather sordid way of managing the relationship between two countries.This man does believe strongly in what the Americans have to say,the way they ask him to go about ruling his country,politics & probably given a choice his personal life too.and yeah proved to be right now when the US asked him to step down now,he did without holding back.Civilian president - funny coz as far things have been there's not going to be any big change.Afterall the New Chief Army has been personally handpicked by the man himself.Not that we don't have this kind of high profile drama in our country.We had gone through our bit of Emergency (thanx to Indira Gandhi).Infact i had to appreciate his audacity for saying that he wouldn't have allowed his plane to land anywhere but India.Several such incidents where he could have just thought twice before putting it across in public.Afterall it's not a book that was meant strictly for Pakis alone.We unfortunate souls too have a chance to read throught the book.Was so sounding so childish that if this was given as our supplementary - kids definitely will have a laugh or two.For all that that's said in the book,we have a different version.And thanks to technology we can google & can learn the truth.Am not saying that India never made any mistakes,but at the same time the way he had put across certain situations was way too much.

Whomever said Love thy neighbour will have to take a leaf out of Prez's book.After all our man's eternally in the firing line.

Men may come & men may go

No if you think that this blog of mine's going to be about my relationships or anything - then you're partially wrong :)Yeah true that it's tough to decipher & understand a gal but believe me when i say it's tougher when it comes to guys.And the funny part is that me inspite of being the apple of the eye for few of them in my life i still strike a wrong chord or two.ALWAYS.With dad,Krishna & few others but the worst part is that everytime i try & makeup i endup falling flat.I don't know where i go wrong or rather how i can.Is it wrong to express myself coz i've even faced the wrath of one such person just because he didn't like the way i decided on a certain thing in my life and we just stopped speaking.

I say Yes & he says No and when he says Yes,i say No.I wonder when i'll ever get it right,i wonder when i ever will make it right and yeah wonders never cease :)

Love - Phewwwwww

This blog is specially for those 2 who make my life.One is my twin with whom i just can't stay angry & the other one is Krishna with whom i share the same feeling.These 2 are the ones i turn to when there's anything that happens in my life.Anyday anytime i know that i can turn to them for help,solution,suggestion - you name it they give it to me.With these 2 i have been rude,cruel,angry,happy,spent some best moments of my life infact lotsa super moments.And i have always felt bad in the end for treating them that way but yeah they understand me well that i don't have to think otherwise :) (taking too much advantage).And ofcourse another person i definitely will mention here is Ajay.That idiot to whom i crib,cry when i fight with the other 2.One who really has been patient in so many things & generally the rapport we share is just great.Infact we never feel awkward or slightly embarrased when am in bangalore along with Keerthi & Steve.

If i say thanx that's never going to be enough coz it's beyond that.Forgive me if you can when i have been reckless,thoughtless & idiotic.And never stop loving me coz it's just one rather the only thing that keeps me going.And i inturn will try & curb my temper,be a nice person & stop hurting with my words.Never stop being the way you are.

Love you Lamzu for what you are to me,Krishna - love you for putting up with my tantrums & Ajay for my usual self

On a serious note

On her way back from my aunt's place on one evening my mom saw these 2 old people who were standing on the road & asking for some change or help.Very old folks & with tears streaming down.My mom stopped by & took them to a nearby stall,got them some refreshments and in the meanwhile also came to know through the old lady that they have been asked to leave their son's house because his wife can't get along with them.Luckily while standing there wondering what next,there came another lady & said that she'll take them to a home nearby.Witnessed yet another scene y'day. An elderly man with a middle aged guy.The latter holding hands,trying to counsel or rather consol him for whatever it is.One scene which is very commonly seen in many of the old age homes & care centres which are on the rising side these days.Have always wondered as to what it takes kids to abandon their parents.Oh there are people who say that they spend a fortune in putting their parents in such homes but brings the question - can't you take care of your parents?Cant you have them near you if not in your own home & take care?Men esp who thinks that their wives are right when the she says that she can't take care of his parents but will willingly do the same to her side.I know i might sound biased or probably way out of my league when i say that it's mostly the ladies who prefer to take such decisions (they say they're forced - always).But at the same time i wouldn't deny the fact that there are cases when circumstances force you to take such decisions - but my only question is that why can't you have them atleast near you & take care?Won't it give your parentsa sense of support & security?On the flip side i have also seen kids being so nice out but then make their parents work esp the household chores inside.Well to say even my own grandmom is a victim of this emotional blackmail.When i was a kid,innocent,naive one i used to feel so good about the fact that my aunt wants my grandmom always.But when i grewup all of us know that it's purely for her own selfish reasons she wants her there :( & sadly my grandmom still can't differentiate chalk to cheese.

Am sure that neither my sis nor i will ever make our parents or inlaws go through this.I know the hurt & helplessness one has to go through.Am sure most of us wouldn't but then just leaves me with just one question - why do you succumb to such things,emotional blackmail,crying out loud,financial crisis & what not?Am sure answers are many for these but..

It's my life

Today i realised and i took a vow that i'll never ever have any kinda expectations or crib about something that i don't have.This is my 2nd visit to Kaakum Karangal and this visit only makes my decision stronger in adopting a kid in future.Seeing those kids' faces lighten up when they were given a new set of dress;had me think about the shopping me & my sis have done so far and i had tears in my eyes to think about the kids there.And it is just from today am gonna let of go of certain things in my life.Let go of my ego,short temper & what not.It's going to take sometime but hey i know i can do that.Probably will follow the policy of life is a like hand full of sand ;the tighter the grip,the faster it slips down.Afterall expectations never work in the way you want to and in the end you become responsible for your own actions & mainly reactions.

Letting go is always painful but hey the pain's just momentary when compared to what i might have to go thru my whole life.Coming this far in my life;i don't want to lose it.Well these are my own thoughts & am solely responsible for what i write here :)